Piece by Peace
The subtle art of finding of relaxtion.
via delaes on pintrest here
I am absolutely coming undone by how much rest and recovery my body needs, and how much I resist it. I just dropped my children off at pottery camp, which is owned by my dear, incredible friend—a woman of color and the most supportive being on earth.
As much as I tried to work this summer (since I work in education), I wasn’t approved or given a position. So, I’ll return to work in August. I’m very fortunate to have saved money for the summer. Still, I keep asking myself: What am I supposed to do with myself during this time? How do I invest in myself without spending tons of money every day on overpriced sugary coffee drinks or unnecessary shopping at TJ Maxx or Marshalls?
I have to get to know myself. I need to relax. But that has proven incredibly difficult in the three weeks or so that I’ve been off work and on summer break. I have, in fact, prayed for moments like this—moments of solitude, rest, and relaxation—and yet my body refuses to soften and let go.
A simple morning walk under the sky, hearing the birds heading home; watching something delicate and colorful; documenting Black women’s lives; reading bell hooks and highlighting her words; having the opportunity and time to do these things for myself; having a lover wishing me well throughout the day, saying they’re thinking of me and asking how they can make my life easier—these are all things I wanted.
My children are blossoming, becoming themselves, forming their own personalities. They’re moving through those awkward moments, I wish I’d had someone like me to share with when I was their age.
I am emotional, but I refuse to cry. I can’t fully explain this feeling in 2026, how I prayed for this, especially when last summer I was swallowed by debt, depression, and sadness. Is this what it feels like to be favored?
My 30s have become something I once only dreamed of. The girl child in me is so proud, and yet the anxiety in me is craving more. But what more can I say? This is not to brag. This is just to let you know that things are possible—maybe even inevitable—if you believe enough.